taking a nap is always so risky like when will I wake up? in thirty minutes? in 2 hours? in 7 years?? no one can be sure
“I keep rearranging the letters of my sisters The Beatles sign on her bedroom door.
She is not happy.”
I’ve given up trying to make them normal.
ok and now there’s another one
i didnt know the beatles could become so many words
My brother says “shit happens” in response to everything
My brother was given a “shit happens” mug because of this
My brother loved his “shit happens” mug like a child
Last week, my brother dropped his “shit happens” mug
You probably know what his reaction was
people that are in relationships but still flirt with you anyway
FUN STORY: my grandma lives in a city that was currently taken over by drug dealers and gangs and it’s now divided in two and my grandma is the oNLY CITIZEN IN THE WHOLE CITY who can go walking freely through both sides of the town because she used to do community work and feed the poor kids and those gang members were all fed by her so they let her come and go as she wants SO WHAT WE LEARN TODAY IS TO BE FUCKING NICE TO KIDS BC U MIGHT BE DEALING W FUTURE GANG MEMBERS
One time this girl really hated me and wanted to ruin my reputation or something so one day i was talking to a boy and she came up and really obnoxiously said “you know she has a crush on you right?” and he was like “man i hope so or else this is gonna get really awkward”
She fuckin told my boyfriend that i liked him
nicki minaj is 30
she was born 30 years ago
do you think taylor lautner has war-like flash backs of shark boy and lava girl
Me: “What browser are you on?”
Me: “Google Chrome?”
Client: “No, just regular Google.”
Me: “That’s the site. I want to know the browser.”
Client: “Look, we can have this conversation forever, man. But when I hit the internet logo, Google comes up!”
Me: “Okay…What does that “internet logo” look like?
Client: “…A fiery fox, I guess. But that’s irrelevant.”
being “cute” is really hard because even when youre angry people just kinda giggle at you and say “aw youre so cute when youre angry.” no. stop. recognize my power.
best gif use ever
its still fucking adorable